Essay About Your Studies

Learning how to write well takes time and experience, and is generally learned through a trial and error process. Hoping to save you some common mistakes, here is a general guideline and some helpful tips on how to research effectively, what different essay sections should include, and how to present a strong argument. Keep in mind, that this is most relevant for social science papers. Links are provided throughout to selected handouts from the writing center. For more resources from the Writing Center go to their website.

The 10 Myths about Essay Writing

  1. “Essay has to be 5 paragraphs.”
  2. “Never use “I” or write in the first person.”
  3. “A paragraph must contain between 3-5 sentences.”
  4. “Never begin a sentence with ‘and’ or ‘but’.”
  5. “Never repeat a word or phrase in the same paragraph.”
  6. “Longer essays and fancier words are always better and mean a higher mark.”
  7. “Other students are so much better at writing essays.”
  8. “Good writing is an inborn talent.”
  9. “Good writers write quickly, effortlessly, and know exactly what they want to say from the beginning.”
  10. “Good writers never need to edit and don’t need any feedback.”

These statements are absolutely false, and the quicker you can change your mentality away from them the better.

The Basics

The most important and fundamental thing about writing an essay is to make sure that it answers the question the assignment asks. You should ask yourself this question during your brainstorming, researching, writing, and editing phase to make sure that the answer is always yes! You can write a very well-written paper, but if it doesn’t answer the question in the assignment, you will not receive a good grade. When beginning your assignment you should:

  1. Determine what the assignment’s goal or purpose is. This means that you should have a pretty solid idea of what the professor or TA is looking for. Is it an analysis? A compare and contrast? A critical reflection? A book review? A case study? Here is a handout on the different types of essays and what they mean.
  2. Relate it to course content and concepts. This should form the basis of your research. See what concepts are used or what lecture topic(s) this falls under, and look over your notes and readings.
  3. Use the rubric or checklist provided and highlight the important parts you should address.
  4. Identify the technical requirements to make sure you don’t lose little marks. For example, style of citation, title page, formatting, voice, subheadings. If they are not outlined in the assignment, ask! The use of ‘I’ is a very important condition to clarify.
  5. List questions or clarifications you might have, and ask them ahead of time. Meeting your professor or TA to discuss the assignment, present your outline or ideas, and brainstorm different ways to approach it, will really improve the quality of your work.

Researching

Some general things to keep in mind when doing your research is to be careful to stay on topic and always double check with yourself that the research is relevant to your essay. That means not going too broad, but staying focused on your topic and recognizing that just because something is interesting does not mean that it is necessarily relevant to your argument.

Start with class resources and then move to library resources. Sometimes, using a certain number of class readings is a requirement. Make sure you comply with it. It is also a good idea when defining concepts to use class sources and material. Remember to never… EVER use Wikipedia as a cited source. It is a great way to get a better idea of different topics, concepts, people, and trivia, but not acceptable for an academic paper.

Students also tend to fall in the two categories of doing too much research or too little research. Doing too much research can definitely give you a better understanding of the broader issue of your topic, and this can be noticed in your writing. However, you can fall into the trap of adding things that are not necessarily relevant to your topic, resulting in a larger paper then the assignment requires. Doing too little research on the other hand, might not give you enough information on the topic and make for a shorter paper. Also remember, that not all sources you read will be useful, it takes time to find really good sources you can use for your paper. For a social science paper between 6-8 pages you generally should read at least 10 relatively good sources.

Be prepared to go back and research further while you are writing, in order to fill gaps in your arguments. This arises with the question “but why” with the development of your arguments. You also might need to find more supporting evidence to present a more convincing claim.

Make the best use of your time when selecting resources:

  1. Use carefully selected keywords for searches. The trick is to start as narrow as possible to get the sources most relevant to your topic and then substitute with synonyms and broader topics.
  2. Ask your professor or TA to recommend articles or authors on the topic. This is best when you have a wider variety or personal choice on the topic.
  3. The glorious CTRL+F. Most journal articles you can now search with Ctrl+F, so download the PDF or text and quickly give it a keyword search using Ctrl+F. This is especially useful if you are doing a specific case study i.e. country, indigenous peoples, women, or concepts.
  4. Read the abstract and if that looks promising then read the introduction and the conclusion, skimming through the subheadings and/or the first sentence of each paragraph. This will give you a pretty good idea if the article will be of use to you and save you time from reading the whole thing.
  5. Carefully choose the journals/data bases for your search. There are specific journals for different disciplines and regions of the world. The library does a great job at dividing these up. It takes a bit longer to look through each database but you get more quality and relevant sources.

Some ideas and suggestions on taking notes while researching:

  1. Paraphrase the main ideas of the source.
  2. Take notes for each relevant source. You usually need 3 things from a source: the main idea or argument presented, a sub argument or a sentence that is insightful, or evidence to support your arguments.
  3. The new version of Adobe Reader lets you highlight and insert text bubbles (for additional notes and ideas) in PDF files, so you can avoid printing them out or typing out your notes. This saves trees and times. It is also very important not to procrastinate or put-off writing down your ideas. Write it down right away, or you will forget it. Reading certain things can trigger-off brainstorming in your head, or a brilliant thought, or a criticism. Write it down! This will also help you get started on writing, since you will have some ideas written down already.
  4. It is very important to keep track of what information comes from what source, in order to cite correctly and avoid plagiarism.
  5. You should categorize or code your research according to your different arguments and supporting evidence. Re-formatting your research like this, for example all information from all sources relevant to your first argument are put together (keeping their individual citations), makes it much easier to write.
  6. Critically analyze your research. Build a set of concepts and questions, compare different views and arguments and their relevance and importance to your research. Instead of just listing and summarizing items, assess them, discussing their strengths and weaknesses. As well, be aware of biases in sources, both academic and news media.

Creating an Outline

Writing an outline is invaluable to help organize your thoughts and the structure of your essay informally, in order to check strengths and relevance of arguments, consistency with thesis, and flow. Your outline doesn’t have to be fully written out, as if you are handing it in to be marked, scribble it on a napkin, carve it into your desk, whatever helps you to outline your arguments and explain the flow to yourself. It will help you to pick up contradictions and weaknesses in your arguments before you start writing and it keeps you from going off-track. This is also a good stage to check with your professor or TA. You can meet with them in person or e-mail them your outline and thesis to get feedback. Check out this outline handout from the Writing Centre.

Essay Structure: Introduction
The main point of an introduction is to capture the attention of the reader and draw them in. This is why your first sentences should be well thought-out to engage and interest the reader. Always think of an introduction as an upside down triangle. It should start broad and become more narrow and specific. There are different things to include in your introduction, depending on the size of your paper. Since many students are confused about what an introduction should include, here is a general guideline to get you started. Also accept that if you write your introduction first, you will probably have to re-write it or at least tweak it depending on how the rest of your paper turns out.

  • Literature review. The size and detail of this depends on the size of the paper. If you are writing a longer paper, this could be its own section. Mainly it addresses the main arguments and debates in the literature on your topic and how your line of argument is consistent or different from those.
  • Provide background information on your topic, country case, political context, etc.
  • Define the terms relevant to your paper. This is really important as it defines the scope of your paper, especially when using broad all-encompassing terms like empowerment, globalization, international community, democracy, etc.
  • Answer the questions “so what?” / “why is this important?” / “who cares?” / “why should we care?”.
  • Define the scope of your paper. This could be the specific time period you are discussing, country/location, specific case, etc. Being specific about the scope of your paper is like an academic safety guard, diminishing any criticisms for not addressing issues outside of your specified scope.
  • Thesis Statement is the most fundamental component to include in your introduction. It is your basic argument, demonstrating what you are trying to prove. It should be concise and clear and it should be a statement that someone can disagree with a.k.a. an argument.
  • Depending on the length of your paper you can also briefly summarize the organization of your paper. This is like providing a tour for the reader of your arguments to come.

Essay Structure: Body

There are important stylistic guidelines you should follow in the body of your paragraph. For example, you should try and use the same terminology as you find in the literature in order to sound more professional and scholarly. You should also ensure that there is transition and flow between each paragraph and between each argument. Try to explain specifically and clearly how each argument relates to your thesis to make sure your essay sounds more cohesive. Also remember that paragraphs are limited to one idea and should also make a clear point that connects to your argument and thesis. Here is a very useful handout on paragraphs and transition.

Avoid using overly complex language and words. It doesn’t ensure you sound smart or that you’ll get a better grade. Don’t be like Joey from Friends, “they are humid prepossessing Homo Sapiens with full sized aortic pumps” instead of “they are warm, nice people with big hearts”.

Building a strong argument

Reading good journal articles will help you write better by observing how academics develop their arguments. Ask your professor or TA to suggest a couple of well-written articles that you can learn from.

Every argument should have the following structure:
Claim (because of) Reason (based on) Evidence (acknowledging & responding to)Objections/Alternatives.

However, to make your argument more clear, you also need warrant. Warrant is a fancy term that basically shows the relevance of the claim. It is the principle that lets you connect reason and claim. It is the logical connection between a claim and a supporting fact (or evidence). Sometimes, that logical connection will be clear and obvious, where no explanation from the writer is needed. More often though, the writer needs to supply the warrant, explain how and why a particular piece of evidence is good support for a specific claim. This will tremendously improve the clarity of your writing and will help people outside your discipline to better follow and understand your arguments.

Addressing counterarguments is also an important part of developing a strong argument. It shows you have done extensive research and you have a good understanding of the topic in question. You should acknowledge existing and possible objections to your arguments and respond to them, discrediting them or showing why they don’t hold true in your case. If relevant and important, you should also address counterargument you cannot refute and concede to them.

Evidence is the last component you need to make a strong argument. Evidence supports your claims and convinces the reader. Evidence should be relevant, reliable, and representative of your reasoning. It is also a good idea to use several pieces of evidence for each argument, rather than just one. It could also be either primary or secondary. Here are some different types of evidence:

  • Direct quotations (check out verbs for citing and verbs for introducing quotations
  • Statistics
  • Historical data
  • Case studies
  • Specific examples (i.e. of projects or experiences of specific groups)
  • Credible newspaper articles
  • Photos, sound recordings, or videos (i.e. the CBC Archives)

For more information, check out this handout on developing a logical argument.

For visual learners, here is what each paragraph or argument should look like:

And this should be the general structure of your paper:

Essay Structure: Conclusion
Remember that the ending matters, just like in the movies. Isn’t it really disappointing when you watch a movie with a great developing, edge-of-your-sear plot line that ends badly and quickly? The same goes for papers. The conclusion should bring it all together, showing that you have proven your thesis. Opposite to the introduction, it should start narrow and become broader. The most important point in a conclusion: do not introduce new arguments! Here are some general guidelines on what conclusions should include:

  • Paraphrase your thesis and demonstrate how you have proven it with your arguments.
  • Answer again the questions “so what?” and “why is this important?”
  • Outline some of the lessons learned.
  • Discuss some of the implications of your findings and analysis.
  • Relate it to the wider context on the subject, course themes, or discipline.
  • Identify some of the future areas for research that your paper opens up.

Editing, Revising, and Proofreading (preferably not at 4am the night before)

Best case scenario is to take some time (a day or two) between finishing your final draft and editing to give you some distance from your work. When editing, you should read slowly and out loud to catch run-on sentences or unclear ideas. Make a checklist for editing and proofreading. Here is an example of one. It is also a good idea to have someone else read your paper. Pretty much anyone will be able to catch small spelling and grammar mistakes that you have missed no matter how many times you have read over your paper. Someone in your class/field will be able to help you with the content, while someone not in your class/field is the best audience to test how well you explain your ideas and concepts. You should also look for someone who isn’t afraid to give you constructive criticism. Having said that, remember that everyone writes differently (i.e. has a different style), so you should also be critical of changes offered to you.

As well, start taking notice of the mistakes you usually make, so you can search out for them specifically. This can also be related to words you usually misspell or commonly confused words (i.e. complement & compliment, then & than, your & you’re).

Works Cited

Plagiarism is the most serious academic offence. If you are found guilty of plagiarism you can fail the assignment or the class, or be suspended or expelled from university. It could even affect your chances of getting into a grad program, as it remains on your record, and you are required to give an explanation as to what happened (even if you have only been investigated). The point is, good citation is really important. You shouldn’t take the risk of being caught of plagiarism and you should give other academics due credit for their work.

The most important thing to remember after selecting your preferred (or required) citation style is that in-text citation must match the work cited list. This means consistency with the author and the year, but also that you cannot have in-text citations that don’t have a full reference in the work cited, just like you cannot have a full reference without citing it throughout the text. Citation style also has to be consistent throughout the paper (i.e. you cannot go from APA to MLA). If you use sourcing engines to make your references, always double check their accuracy.

Here are some resources for APA style citation from the Writing Center and Owl.

Some final points about writing papers:

  • The length of sections should be proportionate to the size of your essay. So a 1 page introduction to a 5 page essay is too much.
  • When the assignment says between 6-8 pages, it is better to do 8 than 6. When you have such limited number of pages, you need space to develop your argument. However, don’t just ramble on and on, repeating the same arguments in different ways to fill-up space.
  • Remember that clarity and conciseness are your friends.
  • Try and use a more active, instead of a passive voice, to sounds more assertive and succinct. (See this handout)

Sample Graduate Application Essay - After

EssayEdge significantly improves each essay using the same voice as the author. The only way to evaluate editing is to compare the original essay with the edited version. We significantly improve essays both for clients who write poorly and for clients who write well.

Edited Essay

As a single mother who has confronted homelessness and poverty, I am committed to reforming public education. I have a particular interest in improving the accessibility of schooling to homeless individuals, single mothers, and disadvantaged women of color. As a result of my own experiences, I am familiar with the despair and frustration endemic to individuals struggling to survive. I am convinced that increasing individuals' access to education can make the difference between despondency and hope. I am applying for my doctorate in educational leadership so that I can pursue my life-mission: to make education accessible to all.

I began preparing for this mission by volunteering as an intake coordinator at the Christian Assistance Ministry (CAM). Although I had many responsibilities, the role that consumed most of my time and energy was interviewing clients and assessing their physical and emotional needs. One of my greatest contributions was streamlining and updating the paperwork associated with CAM's intake process. I also generated an updated resource list that included many service agencies in the Houston area. By personally contacting each agency to acquire contact information and to learn about its services, I facilitated greater communication between service organizations and ensured that my clients had access to necessary aid.

In my present position as Research Analyst at SeaNet, my primary role is ascertaining the needs of client networks. As an umbrella group, SeaNet has only limited contact with small business development centers, and my job is to ensure that our organization meets these centers' needs. When I took the initiative to send out surveys asking agencies to rate our group's effectiveness, I received an overwhelming response. The information I compiled was so revealing that it was published in the quarterly report that is sent to our funding agency in Washington, D.C. In addition, I have been involved in a number of special, innovative projects. Recently, I analyzed the availability of renewable energy resources in Southern Texas in tandem with The Economic Development Center, Solar Energy, Brooks Air Force Base, and research universities in Texas.

As part of my master's thesis, I collaborated with Upward Bound, Peace Center, and the Davis Education Foundation to underline the importance of community cooperation in public schools. I also provided informational brochures and handouts detailing other such organizations that could assist with the individualized needs of schools. I was gratified when my efforts resulted in teachers and administrators contacting several of the organizations I had mentioned so that the organizations could start outreach in their educational districts.

Although I have not yet been employed in the educational sector, my master's work, as well as my life experiences, has given me a nuanced and sophisticated knowledge of the educational field. I have acted as a mentor at Davis Middle School for many years and have tutored a number of home-schooled children. When my own children attended school, I was involved in their schools' organizations and often took on a leadership role on educational committees. I served on many boards and was active in assisting both instructors and administrators. Fifteen years of experience has familiarized me with the diverse needs of Houston's students, and it has prepared me to act on their behalf.

My short-term goals include advancing my knowledge of quantitative research using programs such as SPSS and Microcas, and acquiring a sophisticated understanding of how to become a leader in the educational field. I wish to use these skills to promote empirical studies in education that can help direct educational reform.

I am attracted to the doctoral program at Texas A&M for precisely this reason. Only Texas A&M offers the kind of collaborative experience that suits my personal needs and professional goals. Over the past four years, I have seen the department blossom into a challenging and innovative program. I am excited about the program's direction and its emphasis on practical application. I appreciate that every course offers the opportunity for independent research, and that the faculty is open to student suggestions for improvement. The flexibility and patience of the faculty and the talent of the students makes Texas A&M a singular choice for my doctoral degree.

My long-term goal is to use my past experience and Texas A&M training to help make education accessible to all, particularly the underprivileged. Whether I am working in the public or private sector, I look forward to addressing the nation's urgent need to educate its citizens efficiently and comprehensively.

Customer's Comments

"I liked the total restructuring of the essay, and the ability of your editor to fill in the blanks with some fairly accurate examples and descriptions just from context. I obviously knew that my essay needed some work and I could not grasp how to fix it. However, your editor gave me a sigh of relief. His structural changes made sense to me and the overall flow and strength of the essay improved. I don't think I could have done this if I spent a year writing just this essay. I am convinced now that your service is good and I will surely use it again."

Critique

Click Here for the Edited Version.

Dear Jane,

I read your personal statement with great interest. You do a good job of showing the reader your diligent preparation for a career in education. By emphasizing your research-oriented background and your practical experience in the educational sector, you show that you have the knowledge and resolve to excel in a doctoral program.

However, there are ways in which your essay could be improved. My comments in this critique describe ways to make your writing more vivid and offer recommendations on how to make your statement more convincing.

Many of the changes I made to this essay were confined to the sentence level. I reworked awkward phrases, varied your vocabulary, adjusted diction, and improved the direction and flow of your writing. I also made subtle but significant changes such as eliminating redundant sentences like, "My purpose for seeking a [doctorate in education] is to expand my knowledge of theory and research as it pertains to education."

I also read your essays with a careful eye toward whether you effectively answered the question. In addition, I closely examined your statements, determining whether more detail or a fresh approach was needed to improve the effectiveness of your essay. Upon review, I feel confident that you addressed all the aspects of this multi-pronged topic, but I have made a number of suggestions for how to improve your essay's delivery.

The overall content of your essay was strong, but its expression was awkward at times. I agree that your essay needs a "stronger sense of purpose," and I believe that the reason your essay feels "wishy-washy" is that you do not have strongly-articulated goals. Broad career objectives like, "establishing a network of scholars and future administrators participating in a rigorous intellectual process," are too vague; you need to give your reader a precise sense of what you want to do.

Your essay will be much more persuasive if you articulate specific intermediate and long-term career goals. Because you have already accomplished significant work in the educational field, the committee will expect you to have clearly-defined objectives in your doctoral studies. Given your experience, you may want to discuss your specific plans for your dissertation.

Here are my specific comments on each individual paragraph of your essay:

Paragraph 1

Your introduction suffered from an excessive reliance on circular logic ("I seek an education because I am interested in education. I want to fine-tune my research skills because research skills are important to a career in education."). Sentences like these obscure rather than clarify your goals, and I sought to make your writing more active and transparent. I eliminated your entire first paragraph and incorporated your discussion of "purpose" into a new engaging introduction.

I also liked this paragraph's allusion to your role as a "reformist." Nonetheless, I felt that this passage would be stronger if you did more to define this term. What do you want to reform? Can you give concrete examples?

"I have struggled hard to get myself out of this situation..."

I liked the passion you convey in this sentence, but you need to maintain a formal, almost reserved voice in academic writing. See my suggestion for alternative wording that does a better job of capturing your experience and of demonstrating how that experience has influenced your decision to seek an advanced degree.

Paragraph 2

This paragraph did a good job of describing your work at the Christian Assistance Ministry. Nonetheless, your argument digressed somewhat during your discussion of the difficulties faced by social workers. This paragraph is most effective if you focus on your accomplishments and on the needs of your clients.

Also, please note that even though the refined paragraph is more concise than your original, it still retains all the significant content. The ability to condense and synthesize information is highly prized by admissions committees.

Paragraph 3

This paragraph required more up-front details. You mention some diverse research experiences, which is good, but you should also cite the title of your position and describe your primary responsibilities.

Because the name of your company implies that you do small business development, a reader might be confused by your research in seemingly unrelated fields. Be sure that I accurately conveyed the essence of your professional responsibilities in my revised version of this paragraph.

Paragraph 4

To ensure that your description of the learning center is intelligible, I added more details to place this discussion in context.

"I am also an advocate of 21st Century Learning Centers that would provide a safe refuge for the millions of latch-key children in this country that go home to an empty house on any given school day."

You need to be more exacting in your transition sentences. By using a transition sentence like this, the reader assumes your entire paragraph will describe your work with latchkey children. As a result, your treatment of other topics catches the reader off guard.

"I also provided information in the form of brochures and handouts about other such organizations that could assist in the needs of their own schools."

This sentence does not tell the reader enough about your experience. Whenever you write, be sure that a reader who is unfamiliar with your accomplishments will understand the subject, object, and action of each sentence.

Please note that the term "advocate" could apply to either paid or unpaid work. You should specify the exact capacity in which you worked, especially as this is important to placing your accomplishment in perspective.

Finally, if you have time, you may wish to rework this section. A thorough description of one particular project (perhaps your thesis topic) would be much more persuasive than a list of numerous activities.

Paragraph 5

I do not think this paragraph adds much to your essay. You need to prove your qualifications through examples rather than simply describe them to reader.

"I have a very hard working and decisive character that has earned me a 4.0 GPA."

This sentence is a good example of an uncorroborated assertion. Although you are undoubtedly hard working and decisive, you need to prove it to the reader through concrete examples.

Paragraphs 6 to 8

As I mentioned in the first section of my critique, your essay will be stronger if you cite more specific goals. See my suggestions in the text, and be sure to elaborate on your specific areas of interest.

I suggest concluding your essay with the description of your long-term goals. Reemphasizing your desire to make education accessible to all is a great way to conclude your essay, and it brings your statement to a resonant close.

Overall, this is an excellent start to a compelling essay. Keep in mind that although the committee allows you to write up to five pages, three double-spaced pages is usually adequate. Feel free to add more detail, but make sure your text is concise and transparent. You might consider "writing" ideas and then "rewriting" them. Too often, authors put ideas onto the page, but do not render those ideas compellingly. Giving your sentences a bit of extra effort, and giving your experiences a bit of extra reflection, will result in a persuasive essay that compliments your accomplishments and character.

I wish you the best of luck in the admissions process.

Sincerely,
Your EssayEdge Editor

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